Oh My Goodness, What A Day!... Randoms & Entertainment

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

ode to the man who leaves me awe struck and jaw dropped.

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[part 1]
to notice is to admire

The other day was the first time in a loooong time that i visited SAM.
i didnt feel it then, but when i think back to it now, a strange sort of far away feeling comes over me.
/
i visited the museum a lot during the 'dark period' of my poly life. but it's not that i feel a strange discomfort right now. rather, i feel satisfied that i finally got my tush out of the house to visit him (whilst i'm fairly certain SAM is genderless [rare for me to admit to objects being genderless... i normally feel a strong pull towards objects being either male or female], SAM as a name and the building has such a masculine feel to it...). haha
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okay sorry... i kinda get engrossed with talking so much, explaining so much... that i never do get to the point.
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anyways, what i wanted to say was, i enjoyed the trip thoroughly!
haha! i'd bet that was quite an anti climax...
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whilst i use to shun visiting museums with people for fear that their opinions and views would shroud my own, i reckon i've found a good companion to museum hop with this time around!
Prrrrr-eeeee-senting.. (Over on the right side of the ring...) Miss-ter, Clarence Aw!
he's quite the Ying to my Yang... (but i want to be Ying... so yeh...).
He's a little too straight forward for my easily bruised sensitivity BUT quite a breath of fresh air.
;
Seldom one to talk much, but when he does, his words are razor sharp tipped and concise beyond worldly imaginable.
i really admire his way with words because every word, every sentence structured is so...weighted. as though, his mind races within that millisecond to form the perfect word / series of words to describe something / person / situation.
talking to / with him can be a struggle though.
only because he is probably the only person i know who can silence me with a single word.
if that isn't an innate skill, i dont know What is.
'
it's not that conversations are stunted. it's not that he intentionally chooses to dead-end our badinage. it's just that sometimes, he summarizes things so tightly that, really, there is Nothing more for me to add! it's unquestionably impressive my friends.

okay but back to the museum visit... (haha! i hear you going, 'zzz. omg! what a bloody backside long intro!' Look! we all jive differently okay? clarence the simplistic and drea the convoluted.. haha)
it was interesting the way we viewed the exhibits.
normally i would be thrown off by people saying things like, 'what do you interpret from this?', because i would feel suddenly vulnerable.
suddenly naked and without clothing that is a valid answer.
but this time, i felt firm about my realisation which was this:
>whilst clarence is one who is focused on the final outcome of things, the finished work, the magnum opus, i am more concerned and attentive toward the process work. so much so that i've not spent time at all, wondering about what the artist is trying to tell me.
i ought to, i know. but it's not that i intentionally choose not to. it's just that i first take time to notice it's itsy bitsy details.
Clarence, i admire the way you choose to deliver yourself. whether it is your relation to people or pieces of work or down to your own projects.
*takes hat off*



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[part 2]
to be impressed by the common people


i'd like to put it down to my being more mature> that i no longer look at everyone as an indirect form of competition.

] i dont look at a friend and think 'shits, i should / ought to have set up an online business too. she's so damned visionary.'
] i dont look at a friend and think 'damn i should / ought to be as focused and motivated as he/she is.'
] i dont look at some random person who happens to be +/- 1-5 yrs my age and think 'damn, i should / ought to be writing / doing that type of article / thing.'

no.
i've come to terms with the reality that, if i put myself out there enough, if i challenged myself to be as vulnerable as these people have been, i'd have all that they have under my belt too.
and i'm not beating myself up over it either. it's a matter of fact that whilst yes, if i wanted it, i could have achieve it, it's obvious i've not wanted it as Much as others have, for there has been no hunger to attain.
an engine without oil is just no way to drive!


but i am caught on a phrase that a dear friend of mine said recently:
'He creates opportunities for himself!'



now That, is a line+meaning behind it, that i'm stuck on!

Posted by AndreaMaryFam at 11:37 PM